Ever More

A dimly lit night I sat
While gloomy and frustrated
A lightly tapping at my keyboard
Hopes and dreams abated

When in my mind it came
A distant type of clatter
The thought of past
Though present was a tatter

It drew me back to younger days
Where I sat beaten and battered
Those words and actions
Where care should have mattered

A ticking clock keeps time well
Yet the mind remains a trap
Again a clatter in my head
Louder and louder than a tap

A younger being has more time
Wasted when no one holds it
Pushed away from all that's good
Then told to just ignore it

If only it had been a dream
The violence in my head
Pictures and sounds like leaves
Cover like blankets on the bed

Present now I set typing
Looking down at the floor
How did I bear it up 'til now?
Will I bear it ever more?